The Never-ending Purpose-seeking Journey

a small insight to Al-Jahiz's infamous 'Kitab Al- Hayawan'

وَإِذْ يَمْكُرُ بِكَ الَّذِينَ كَفَرُوا لِيُثْبِتُوكَ أَوْ يَقْتُلُوكَ أَوْ يُخْرِجُوكَ ۚ وَيَمْكُرُونَ وَيَمْكُرُ اللَّهُ ۖ وَاللَّهُ خَيْرُ الْمَاكِرِينَ - 8:30

And [remember, O Muhammad], when those who disbelieved plotted against you to restrain you or kill you or evict you [from Makkah]. But they plan, and Allah plans. And Allah is the best of planners.

Driven people have always captivated me.

 Its as if they have only the most crucial thing I've lost- the uncanny ability to be enduring and ikhlas whilst pursuing their purposes in life. Its mesmerizing how that sincerity can actually be seen through that small spark in their eyes whenever they get into the zone. I haven't a purpose to begin with. You know, that controlling mindset I should be waking up to every morning, which ensures I get out of bed with a jolt of enthusiasm? Well, at least, not just yet. 

Hmm, suppose individuality has a lot to do with creating a unique and solid persona? Absolutely! InshaAllah, I'll try my best to stay true to my beliefs and roots whilst being the best version of it, regardless how kooky or timid I naturally am. Thinking back, its always the one who sticks out like a sore thumb, right? Our prophet Muhammad SAW  was deemed a liar by the non-believers , yet was eventually dubbed as the No.1 influencer of all time, by a non-muslim also. (Thank you, Michael Hart!) Aaand since I'm quite new to the fandom, Newt Scamander, who's character happened to specifically tap on my career-path problems.

:'))

You see, throughout my last years in high school, I've always thought that being a zoologist was going to be my endgame. My mind was dead set on it, flaunting my aspirations in hope that people would also sambut my du'as in return. Blink! Here I am, in UPM with no zoology courses at all offered in degree.

And so I frequently asked myself.
"What am I doing here?"

Well to cut the drama short, after observing how Newt carried out his duties as a magizoologist with so much passion, it finally became clear to me. The reason as to why all my career dreams since childhood pranced around the idea of working with animals as a living (from being a zookeeper to a wildlife vet and anything in between),was  all thanks to that deep connection I felt  being animals ever since I was a kid. Jazakumullah, mummy and babak! Sad that I'm dampening the burning passion lately. But I intend to not let things swing that way any longer. It doesn't matter wh0 I'll end up as. As long as I'm purposeful, ikhlas and passionate about it, InshaAllah, all is well.

Here's another reality check.

Truth is, Ive been too busy anticipating my next vicissitudes in life, to the point that I've never really considered about my ukhrawi goals as tall as my duniawi ones. Aand here comes a mysterious icon I look up to , Al-Jahiz, the first Muslim Zoologist who happens to be a scholar in a wide array of fields such as Arabic grammar, poetry and rhetoric (whatever that means, hmz)

Given that such people exist, I'll try to keep in mind that Allah has His reasons for allowing their biographies to cross paths with me in the first place.

And i hope you'll be alright in looking for your purpose. Besides, I personally think as long as we're here breathing, we've still got time looking for our destined path.